Twins Porn 4/3/13

In last week’s Twins Porn, we looked at the baseball career of the guy who founded Little Caesar’s and the player who invented the high-five. Today, we’ll take a look at a man who refused to take a walk, and a couple of television stars who would gladly trade in their season premiere on Sunday to have been playing on Opening Day this past Monday.

When I was a kid, it seemed like once every season my dad would pull me out of elementary school to go to a Twins game. I’d get called down to the office, and my dad would be there in his suit and we’d just leave. I don’t know if they let parents do that anymore.

We’d go to the science museum and movies, too, and it’s always cool when you’re eight to play hooky, but it’s the baseball games in the middle of the school day that always exhilarated me. My dad was playing hooky, too, so maybe that feeling never really goes away.

I’m going to the noon game tomorrow against the Tigers, and I’m going to drink a couple of beers in the middle of the day and eat a hot dog and peanuts for lunch. I don’t have a wife or any serious healthy conditions, so I could probably do that every day if I wanted to. But I don’t. That’s what I do when I go to baseball games in the middle of the day in the middle of the week. That’s what I do when I play hooky.

Jon Hamm and John Slattery Played Baseball

The Mad Men season premiere is Sunday, so I thought I’d throw these two together. Hamm was apparently somewhat of an athlete in high school, playing baseball and football for John Burroughs School in Ladue, Missouri, a wealthy suburb of St. Louis. Hamm claims to have been a pretty good high school catcher, and briefly considered trying to walk on at the University of Texas in the late 80s. He’s a huge Cardinals fan, and narrated the team’s 2011 World Series highlight film. The photo at the top of this post is of Hamm in high school.

Slattery, pictured at left, dreamed of playing professional baseball like a lot of kids in Boston, but didn’t play as long as Hamm. He did, however, have a connection to the game closer than Hamm’s tenuous connection to Roger Clemens. Slattery’s mother was related through marriage to the Red Sox travelling secretary at the time, Jack Rogers, and Slattery got free tickets to almost every Boston home game as a kid. I’m envious.

Ernie Bowman Had a Higher AVG Than OBP

There are actually a number of players whose stat lines show this anomaly, but Bowman had the most career plate appearances of the bunch. He also managed to go the entire 1963 season without a walk, one of four players to do so with at least 100 plate appearances.

So how does a player end up with a higher batting average than on-base percentage? More sacrifices than walks. In that 1963 season, the 27-year-old utility infielder had four sacrifice hits and a pair of sac flies. Bowman walked twice over parts of three seasons with the San Francisco Giants.

This Week’s Number: 1

That’s the number of balls Aaron Hicks has put in play so far this season in seven plate appearances. He has four strikeouts and two walks.

This Week’s Fact: Yu Darvish lost a perfect game last night with two outs left. He joins a fraternity of 11 pitchers, including Mike Mussina in 2001.

Here’s a video of Jon Hamm being interviewed by an awkward little girl at last year’s All Star Game.

I’m going to enjoy my time at the game tomorrow, win or lose. Hope you enjoy the rest of the first week of baseball, too. It’s warming up out there.

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